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Advice: How Guys Screw Up First Dates
I get a lot of guys who write in to ask me for dating advice
on how to behave around women. Many of those questions focus
on the first meeting or the first date.
I thought I'd devote one entire newsletter to a concept
that I feel is VITAL to understand if you're wondering how
to behave around a woman you've just met.
A MISTAKE ALMOST EVERY GUY MAKES
I've noticed a KEY difference between the way men and women
act when they meet a "potential mate".
Women usually act in a way that can be characterized like
"You're interesting to me. I'd like to get to know you better,
and we can see where this goes."
Men usually act in a way that can be characterized like
"I am so interested in you that I'm nervous. In fact, I'm
already thinking of you as a potential girlfriend or wife...
or at least a one-night stand."
In other words, women are usually casual and laid-back when
they're first meeting a guy...
But GUYS tend to act like every girl is a POTENTIAL WIFE.
As you can imagine, this creates a lot of tension and pressure.
And I'm not talking about the GOOD kind, either.
I'm talking about the kind that makes men shiver and shake
with nervousness, and women feel uncomfortable because the
MAN is acting uncomfortable.
I KNOW that you can relate to this in some way.
The simple dating advice here is...
DON'T DO IT.
If you start acting all freakish and nervous when you're
talking to a woman, you're probably going to screw things
up before they've even had a chance to get started.
Treating a woman that you've just met as if she very well
could be the love of your life is something you should NEVER
Instead, take a very different approach.
My favorite is to ASSUME that every woman has SOMETHING
that's going to annoy me, bother me, or SCREW UP HER CHANCES
The MAIN reason that I do this...
IS THAT IT'S TRUE!
The fact is that MOST women are NOT compatible "long term"
with most men. In other words, there if you do get into
a long-term relationship with a particular woman, the chances
are that she's going to have things about her that you don't
One of my favorite Cocky & Funny themes to follow is "You're
screwing up your chances with me".
Let's say I'm walking down the street with a girl to have
a cup of tea. Let's assume that she and I just met the night
before, I got her number, and now we're walking from my
place to tea.
On the way in the door to the coffee shop, she trips over
I might look at her, shake my head in an "overly dramatic
fake annoyed" way, and say "This relationship just isn't
going to work".
Then, let's say fifteen minutes later she spills her tea
on the table and herself.
I'll shake my head again and say "What did I tell you about
this kind of behavior?".
In other words, I'm communicating the very OPPOSITE of "You're
a potential wife". I'm saying "I'm so comfortable around
you that I can even make fun of you without caring what
you think of me".
Does this sound a little crazy?
Good. It should.
But trust me.
If you spend a couple of hours having regular, normal conversation...
being Cocky & Funny, enjoying yourself, NOT trying to impress
her, and generally demonstrating that you could care less
how things turn out, you'll be FAR more likely to take things
further than if you act as if she might be the love of your
life and you wind up acting so nervous, stilted, and DUMB
that she runs away.
So here it is your bit of dating advice... one thing that
most guys who are unsuccessful with women do that screws
things up... one thing to AVOID:
DON'T TREAT A WOMAN YOU'VE JUST MET AS IF SHE'S A POTENTIAL
FUTURE WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND.
Instead, lean back. Be cool. Make jokes about her screwing
up her chances with you. Tell her that she's a nice friend.
Assume that she has qualities that are going to annoy you,
then point them out (in a Cocky & Funny way, of course).
Don't lose your composure. It can be fatal if you do.
Another bit of dating advice:
Most guys don't "get" women.
And, unfortunately, most guys look for tricks and "pick
up lines" when it comes time to LEARN how to meet women.
They don't realize that all the tricks in the world aren't
going to help them if they don't UNDERSTAND what's "going
That's where my free dating advice newsletter comes in,
along with my eBook, "Double Your Dating"...
Dating Advice Newsletter And Download eBook
The first portion of the book is entirely focused on your
"Inner Game". In other words, it's focused on helping you
"get" what's going on.
This book goes into DEPTH about all aspects of psychology
and behavior of men and women... and teaches you from the
ground up. You must get rid of some of your bad programming
before you can get GOOD programming.
You will get pages and pages of me teaching everything from
the ground up on how to take things all the way from beginning
to end... from the first meeting through the first date...
all the way to the bedroom, and beyond.
You'll get dating advice on how to overcome your limiting
beliefs about women... how to eliminate your fears of talking
to women... how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you, even
if you don't have money or looks, etc.
In other words, it's a complete system.
You'll learn everything you need to know in order to start
meeting and dating more women IMMEDIATELY.
All the details, and some great free samples are here...
check it out:
And I'll talk to you again soon.
2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved.
"David DeAngelo" and "Double Your Dating" are trademarks used
by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.